But You're Probably Doing Better Than You Think

Congratulations. You have Impostor Syndrome. I know. Not exactly the congratulations you were hoping for, but hear me out.

After more than 35 years in leadership, and after recently spending two days with an incredible room full of women at our inaugural Elevate conference, I came to a realization.

The people most convinced they're "not enough" are almost never the ones who should be worried. Think about that for a minute.

The person questioning whether they deserve the promotion. The new manager wondering if they’re ready. The executive second-guessing themselves before a board presentation.

The business owner lying awake wondering if everyone will discover she's making it up as she goes. Sound familiar? Ask me how I know.

Here's the funny thing. I've never met an arrogant person who suffers from Impostor Syndrome. The people who think they have all the answers rarely question themselves.

The people who care deeply? The ones who prepare. The ones who want to do a good job. The ones who worry about letting others down. Those are the people who wrestle with it.

Which means your self-doubt may not be evidence that you're unqualified. It may actually be evidence that you care. Now...before you tattoo that on your arm, let's be clear.

There's a difference between humility and letting your inner critic run Human Resources. Because your inner critic? It would be the worst HR director in history. Every performance review would begin with:

"Well...you got lucky."

Every promotion? "Must have been a mistake."

Every success? "Don't get too comfortable. They'll figure you out eventually."

Frankly, if this voice worked in your organization, I'd recommend putting it on a performance improvement plan. 

Gather the Receipts

The next time that little voice whispers, "You don't belong here," I want you to become a detective. Gather the evidence.

Not your feelings. Your facts.

The promotion you earned. The customer you helped. The team you developed. The difficult conversation you navigated. The crisis you solved. The people you've mentored. Your brain is presenting one piece of evidence. Reality has an entire filing cabinet, which means we need to do this: Write. It. Down.

It is extremely helpful to keep a notebook of your accomplishments because the next time that inner critic starts in with its loud voice, take a few moments and flip through those notes. “The Voice” will shut its pie hole in a New York minute.

Stop Comparing Your Chapter 3 to Someone Else's Chapter 17

Comparison is rocket fuel for Impostor Syndrome. We watch someone confidently lead a meeting and assume they've never questioned themselves. Trust me. They have. You just weren't there for the conversation happening inside their head.

Social media doesn't help. LinkedIn certainly doesn't help. Everyone else appears to be winning awards, crushing goals, getting promoted, running marathons, baking sourdough bread, and somehow maintaining a spotless house.

Meanwhile, you're wondering whether matching socks is considered a leadership competency. It’s exhausting. And it's not reality.

Confidence Doesn't Come First

One of the biggest myths I hear is, "I'll do it when I feel more confident." No, you won’t. Confidence usually arrives after you've done the hard thing. Not before. If I had waited until I felt completely ready for every opportunity in my career, I would have missed most of them. Doing the hard thing grows confidence. Yes, it sounds counterintuitive. But it is how it works.

Leadership isn't the absence of fear. It's deciding fear doesn't get the final vote.

Find Your Obi-Wan

Every leader needs someone who occasionally looks them squarely in the eye and says, “You’re being ridiculous. Now go do the thing.” A mentor. A coach. A trusted colleague. Someone who reminds you of what you're capable of when you've temporarily forgotten. Keep those people close. They’re worth their weight in gold.

The next time that little voice asks, “Who do you think you are?” try answering, “Someone who's still learning...just like everyone else in this room.” Then walk into the meeting anyway. Raise your hand anyway. Apply for the position anyway. Share the idea anyway.

Because confidence isn't believing you'll never fail. It’s trusting that if you do...you'll figure it out. And if you've made it this far?

My guess is you've already proven that more times than you realize.

Continue the Conversation

If this article resonated with you, join Women in LBM online on August 5 for Women in LBM Lunch & Learn: The Leadership Trap of Doing Too Much. Dena Cordova-Jack will share practical strategies for recognizing overload, preventing burnout, and creating sustainable success without becoming the person everyone relies on for everything.

This session is open to women working in any role within the lumber and building materials industry.

Women in LBM Lunch & Learn: The Leadership Trap of Doing Too Much
August 5, 2026
Online | 11:30-12:30